He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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