for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
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