So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
