I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
