Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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