he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
