Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
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