she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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