is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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