dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
ok first of all what the fuck
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
