Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
