if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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