i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
