Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
