It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
