I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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