She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
