apparently the secret to your success is patron
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
