wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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