I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
