"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
