spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
