Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Randomize
