wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
