Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
