you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Randomize
