Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
