Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
