Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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