I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Someone signed my nipple.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
