...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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