Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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