how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize
