i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
im on a boat
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