My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
