omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Randomize
