i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
