I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
