Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Randomize
