I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
