Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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