I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Rumble strips road head = magical
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
