All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
