She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
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