Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
