I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
