She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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