got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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