thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
