Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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